Secret Sex Toys
5 most discreet toys for her, him & couples
Some people talk openly about their sex toy use, others not so much. I’m definitely in the first group! But if you’re someone who’d prefer to keep their play private then discreet toys are the answer.
That means no offended partner questioning, ‘Aren’t I good enough?’. No giggling housemate asking, ‘So is this what you’re up to when I’m not around?’. No cheeky children wondering, ‘What does this do? I want to push that button!’.
While there’ll always be a place for traditional sex toys that are instantly recognisable as such, on some occasions, toys that are far more discreet are just what we need.
There are plenty of sex toys that are easy to hide or disguise to suit every budget, need and desire
Perhaps, someone has walked in on you pre-, mid- or post-play and a toy that doesn’t look like a toy will save you an explanation.
Maybe you like to keep your toy in easy reach, on your bedside for instance, but don’t want anyone to know what it is.
Or perhaps, you’re comfortable sharing toy use with your partner, but need to be able to disguise it quickly, say if you can hear the approaching footsteps of your child, housemate, or unexpected visitor.
Whichever the case, there are plenty of sex toys that are easy to hide or disguise to suit every budget, need and desire.
And if you assume that discreet means dull, then think again. Some of the most subtle toys are also the most sensational.
Most discreet women’s vibrators
For women who enjoy solo play using a vibrator, classic cylindrical models, and the downsized version known as a bullet, are among the most discreet.
Have you seen the 1989 movie, Parenthood, when Dianne Wiest’s character Helen Buckman is caught off-guard when a visitor finds her classic, white vibe? Quick-thinking Helen passes it off as a giant ear cleaner to children in the room.
Whether or not Helen’s toy drawer contained more than her classic vibrator we don’t know. What we do know, however, is that many women like varied forms of stimulation and that other vibrator categories are even more popular than the classic.
The best-selling women’s vibes are those which stimulate the clitoris, or g-spot in addition, and these are known as rabbits. I’ll explain why in a sec. Thanks to technological advances, certain options in each category are more discreet now than ever before.
One of the most discreet clitoral stimulators is the Ora 3 by luxury sex toy brand, Lelo, of Sweden.
It looks like an oversized finger ring with a gold-coloured interior and a silky smooth silicone exterior. Just slip your thumb through the ring and hold it against your body with the secret pleasure node directly over your clitoris where it will swirl around like a tongue.
The 3-button control panel is in the perfect position for you to easily switch between 12 settings so you get the stimulation you want.
There are different combinations of swirling and vibrations, and you can take it slow or make it intense, depending on what you feel like in that moment.
Ora 3 is so discreet it’s often referred to as a coffee table toy, because that’s exactly where you can leave it without anyone knowing its true purpose.
Ora 3 is so discreet it’s often referred to as a coffee table toy, because that’s exactly where you can leave it
While clitoral stimulation may be the order of one day, it may not be on another. On certain occasions, many women find that only a rabbit will do.
These vibrators can deliver both clitoral and g-spot stimulation thanks to a shaft that penetrates the vagina and an externally stimulating attachment that often takes the form of bunny ears, hence the name rabbit.
Best-selling brand Womanizer’s reimagined version of the rabbit vibrator is renowned for not only its discretion but also is power to please.
This vibe looks more like a futuristic travel-sized hairdryer than a rabbit – but in a good way. Stay with me while I explain.
Named Duo, it features an oval-shaped barrel with a curved shaft emanating from the back. On the front is an easy-to-use button-operated control panel.
The top of the barrel, closest to the shaft, has a small round opening, which serves as ‘bunny ears’ of sorts. The opening acts as a portal to incredible clitoral stimulation, which feels similar to oral but more intense.
The opening acts as a portal to incredible clitoral stimulation, which feels similar to oral but more intense
Crafted from silky smooth silicone, the toy is around the size of a 600-millilitre water bottle, but much more ergonomic.
Users simply insert the shaft until the external stimulator encloses their clitoris to form a seal. The shaft massages their g-spot with vibrations, while the stimulator uses soft air waves to deliver sucking and massaging sensations to their clitoris without directly touching it. This patented Pleasure Air Technology, is renowned for helping women to achieve faster, more intense orgasms, multiple times in a row.
What’s more, Womanizer’s Duo features Smart Silence Technology. So, if someone walks in while users are cycling through the different vibration, pleasure air, and intensity options, all they need to do is remove the toy from their body and it will turn off! That means it remains her little secret.
Most discreet couple’s sex toy
Some women like to let another person in on their sex toy use – and I don’t mean simply talking about it.
Using sex toys with a partner can help couples enhance their intimacy and sexual pleasure, whatever stage of their relationship. It’s an opportunity for each one to explore their body and that of their lover body while satisfying their needs and wants, pre-existing and new.
Using sex toys with a partner can help couples enhance their intimacy and sexual pleasure
A truly discreet couple’s toy is We-Vibe’s Chorus. We-Vibe is best-known for its wearable couple’s vibrators, with Chorus being the premium model.
Shaped like the letter ‘C’, the flexible silicone design allows the female wearer to make it wider or narrower to better fit her body. Chorus will then stay comfortably in place with one end inside her vagina and the other over her clitoris as the couple changes sex positions, even in water.
The pair can cycle through different modes using the wireless remote control that responds to a squeezing hand, the sensor that picks up movements, or the free We-Vibe We-Connect smartphone app. The app lets users build custom playlists with different modes, intensities and durations and create custom vibrations by drawing on their smartphone screen.
Chorus even comes with a discreet storage case that doubles as a recharging dock and looks at home on a bedside table. No one would guess what’s hiding under the lid.
Most discreet men’s sex toy
While some men enjoy using sex toys with their partner, there’ll be times when they want to enjoy one by themselves – and without anyone ever knowing.
Meet Lelo F1s Developer’s Kit, a masturbator that makes men the masters of their destiny with total discretion.
Using intense dual motors, the cylindrical F1s masturbator delivers truly overwhelming orgasms as sonic waves go deep into the user’s penis and cruise control settings avoid drops in power.
He just slides into the silicone canal, featuring grooves for heightened sensations, and holds onto the textured aluminium body while pressing simple controls designed for one-handed use.
Users can also enjoy visual stimulation, viewing their session through the window panel as powerful waves, instead of standard vibrations, feel as though they’re resonating pleasurably from all directions at once.
Like most Lelo pleasure products, F1s doesn’t even look like a sex toy. It could pass for a portable speaker
F1s is waterproof for adventurous play (hello, long, hot shower sessions!) and can also be used with the free Lelo demonstration app thanks to Bluetooth connectivity.
Like most Lelo pleasure products, F1s doesn’t even look like a sex toy. It could pass for a portable speaker in his home entertainment system.
Most discreet unisex toy
While some sex toys are designed specifically for men or women, or shared use by couples, others can be used by almost any adult.
Consider, for example, glass wands. Usually handblown, these sex toys are available in a range of different shapes and sizes, colours and opacities. The end-products are often exquisite works of art that you could – and I do – display on a console table or even use as an oversized paperweight.
Wands can be used for penetration vaginally or anally, with one of the determining features being the base, or lack thereof.
If the base is no wider than the shaft, then the wand is essentially a dong and should be used for vaginal penetration only. However, if it has a distinctive base, such as a flared handle or finger loop, then the wand is a dildo and safe to use anally by men or women because it can be retrieved with ease.
It’s not just how and by whom wands can be used that makes them so versatile. The glass – specifically borosilicate glass – construction makes these sex toys ideal for temperature play.
Stimulation, versatility and discretion for him, her or both – what more could you want?
Simply heat the wand in warm water, or cool it in the refrigerator or chilled water, before use and get set for exciting new sensations as the wand enters your body and slowly adjusts in temperature until you’re in sync.
Stimulation, versatility and discretion for him, her or both – what more could you want?
Your secret is safe with me
When it comes to discreet sex toys, the options are virtually endless. There are subtle sex toys that she, he and couples can easily hide or comfortably leave on display for unsuspecting eyes.
Whichever option you choose, remember to use it with a compatible lubricant – water-based is a good all-rounder – and sanitise it with toy cleaner before and after play.
